Summer break is over, family is back in Colombia and kids are back in school. Trying to get back into our regular routine but we always struggle organizing our sleeping schedule after weeks of sleeping in. In particular, for me, these past few nights especially have been hard to get a good night sleep. My husband says that I am a bit restless the night before my chemo. Maybe it still gives me a little anxiety the day of my chemo every three weeks, but I am mostly truly thankful for each additional day that has been added to my life by the resources that God has provided for me. Cancer became very advanced in my case from the beginning with the metastasis in my brain on 2013. After the surgery, by the grace of God, I was cancer free for 3 years and finding cancer again in 2016 was actually more devastating than the first time if that is possible. However, God has given me the peace and strength that I have needed to wake up every morning, enjoy and appreciate more my life every day. “Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.” Deuteronomy 3:16
I often hear about the struggles in the lives of others and I understand even more that every human goes through deep trials and challenges. It would seem like my fight for survival is the toughest adversity, but in reality, I rather be fighting for my body than my soul. The confidence that I have received in my relationship with God has taken my fears and filled me with joy and peace. That doesn’t mean that I don’t struggle sometimes, I do wish I could have control of my life and change my circumstances but at the same time when I surrender to God’s will I encounter so much tranquility because I know that in my power I would not know what it is the right thing to do but He has a beautiful story with my name on it. My body might have deteriorated by a malignant tumor, but my soul has flourished through a connection with my creator.
2 Corinthians 4:8-18 English Standard Version (ESV)
8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; 9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 10 always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.