my husband and I thought that as a couple that trusted and loved God we were prepared to go through an uncertainty period in life. When the time came we did not think it was going to last long. We didn’t feel as if it was the worst situation people could face but as big or small our cross was, it was ours. The company where my husband had worked for many years got hit by recession and closed its doors, leaving many unemployed. I worked as a contractor and one income only was not going to meet our financial needs. With 3 children a mortgage and multiple other financial responsibilities we did what we knew to do best, trust God and prepared ourselves to wait with patience while God responded with a job opportunity that could fulfill our needs.
By the end of the year after taking a job that paid less and wasn’t at all attractive to Scott, we decided to put our house on the market thinking that we had to wait a few more months before the perfect job came along. Summer arrived and we had gone through all the savings and extra debt we could afford trying different job alternatives, one that included a good position out of state but with no moving expenses covered. At this point, I panic and could not imagine losing the house while living in it.
I started looking for jobs back home, closer to my mom because she has always been an unconditional support. Ironically, my husband got a job offer in Colombia before me, with extended benefits offered such as moving expenses and a complete furnished apartment. Could this be God opening a complete unexpected door for us? By this time financial problems had killed most of our confidence that God was in control. As the only alternative that gave me peace we said good bye to all our friends, possessions and dreams that we received in Colorado.
School year went by fast. My husband had bravely gone through 12 months of challenges in a new career path, language barriers and cultural adaptation. Our kids were happy with school, probably one of the best ones they could ever be in. They had friends, multiples sports, activities, a comfortable home, food in the table and most important of all we were still together. But even though all that sounds so good me and Scott felt out of place, like a tornado had passed over our lives and dropped us literally in other part of the world.
We know that God has a plan and that all our steps are controlled by His precious grace, but sometimes you still can’t help to feel lost. When we have been used to walk, feeling that we were following His will it becomes very frustrating if you can’t hear His voice and guidance in your ear. Maybe we only need to remember that our weakness draws us closer to Jesus and that this alert feeling of being lost is what helps you remember that you need to give Him the center stage in our life.